What did you want to be as a grown up?

I don't mean when you were a kid. I mean, when you were a young adult and thought about how your life was going to be.

I had more than a few ideas. I have a degree in fashion merchandising, if that tells you anything. I wanted a beautiful, elegant home. I wanted a few kids, lots of friends, a nice church, time to travel, nice clothes, lots of shoes.

I was watching my neighbors today. They are a few years younger than we are. They have a beautiful, elegant home. They just put in a pool and had some friends over for barbeque and swimming. They are both professionals. No kids yet. They looked like they were having a lovely time. All I could think about was: when did I change so much? That just didn't look like that much fun to me. Not the event. The life.

Don't get me wrong. My list isn't all that different than it used to be. I still want a nice home. But I don't think that "elegant" will be used to describe it. I have my "few kids", so my dreams for them are more focused. I still want lots of friends and I want them to visit me frequently. I want a nice church where I can find the best ways I was meant to serve my Lord. Travel? I don't know. I've seen a lot. There are a few things I would like to show my children. But I don't need to spend 3 weeks in Brazil like my neighbors just did. I still love clothes, but I'm happy with something that I feel good wearing. I don't even know who's designing what anymore. And I pretty much hate shoes. Really, I prefer boots, but it is too hot to wear them all the time. I just want something comfortable.

I just don't want as much period. And the things I want are more earthy. I want earth. I want plants and trees and animals. I want to surround myself with people I love, not things I love. In fact, the fewer "things" I have, I think the better. I want to feed people. Both their stomachs and their hearts.

I think the move will be good. I know I feel close to God when I am with "His stuff". All of the accoutrements of city life are lovely, but I want to be closer to God's creations than man's.